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Player Ratings – With Added Fluoxetine

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Raking through the bones of that game would be as useful as getting a pathologist to examine some roadkill to see if the poor creature had diabetes prior to being run over.

West Ham didn’t squish us so much as relentlessly deny us. It would be churlish to just rant at the strikers. So I’ll have a pop at Arry first if I may. When the team you’re playing changes their strategy, it’s a good idea to rethink your own.

Redschnapps has spoken of hesitancy in the last transfer window. We saw it again today. Defoe was selfish again and again yet H was convinced there was a goal in him. Pav actually offered a touch of 18 yard box creativity but was brought on too late.

West Ham put as many men as they could behind the ball yet we had neither the wit or the imagination to change our plan. Bale drew a minimum of two men every time he got the ball – can anyone recall a decent cross in from him? Wayne Bridge muffled Azza Blud also. But still we ploughed on making no gain from bossing the midfield.

Charlie gave the ball away or made a fist of his possession on virtually every single occasion he had the damn thing in the first half. Again, this was allowed to carry on and on and on.

On this showing Real Madrid must be bricking it.

Gomes 7 Didn’t do much, did it well
A&E 7 Mostly very assured
Charlie 4 Slow & clumsy
Gallas 4 What was with the endless back-passes?
Dawson 6 Sensational. For the first 20 minutes
Sandro 7.39 Triffic
Modric 8 Our Champions League class player
Azza Blud 6 Bar the shot failed to make a difference
Bale 7.92 Intelligent and committed
VDV 6.57 Fit?
Defoe 4 For Sale with any luck
Pav 6.56 Tried
Begbie 6 Should be an 8 – twice as good as Charlie
Chris Coleman – Britain’s Most Stupid Human
Redschnapps – Not to be confused with Mourinho

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101 comments

  • TMWNN says:

    Can’t argue with a lot of that, but Dawson is far too easily turned for my liking.

    Sandro and Modric were great.

    Hope the chavs win tomorrow, but with our forward line, 4th is looks like slipping away.

  • Harry Hotspur says:

    Some one on the Beeb saying one of JD’s grandparents died yesterday.

    I wonder if this info would have been released if he had scored 4 :hae:

    • MysteriousStranger says:

      His mind was so affected by this sad news, he nearly forgot to wear his specially made “100 Goals” T-Shirt :sideways:

      If that cunt is wearing it next game, I hope he’s on the bench.

      I said similar on the other thread, but Wrighty wore a similar shirt projecting his future achievement (except the goals total was much higher) – and failed to score, game after game – heaping more pressure on him to get that goal and unveil the legend underneath.

      At least with Wrighty, he was wearing a Red shirt hiding the slogan. With Defoe, we could all read it before the event, through the flimsy white shirt – leaving the little man open to receive even more ridicule than usual. From me, anyway.

      • summerspur says:

        cunt??
        thinks you is proper fucked

        • MysteriousStranger says:

          Really? Why?

          I’m not the one putting his ego before the game. Or wearing a t-shirt proclaiming an achievement not yet achieved.

          It’s a team game. Yet all Defoe is about is “me shoot, me shoot”.

  • DAVSPURS says:

    I said yesterday these players will be off if we finish 5th Modric Van Bale and i still have not bean convinced they are giving there all . These players have Crouch Kranjcar Defoe he his suffering from rotaion sickness caused by Van Defoe needs another striker alongside him to drag defenders away and give him the space we need our conductor Hudds back.

  • Had enough says:

    Get rid of Defoe in the summer he has lost it and is worse than sh!te. Only ever scores against the “lesser” teams and he doesnt even do that anymore. His two missed sitters today from 5 yards out are among the worst I have ever seen. Sell in the summer and put the money toward a real striker. West Ham kicked lumps out of us but dug deep in fairness. Green made an outstanding save from Bale. Modric was amazing, Sandro played well. Too many of these 22 efforts on goal with no result type of games this season, wtf has happened our strike force its beyond ridiculous now. BUY A PROPER FCKING STRIKER IN THE SUMMER ONE WHO CAN SCORE, YA KNOW, GOALS AND STUFF.

  • reno says:

    I felt VDV was very weak, gave no service to Defoe who only started getting meaningfull chances when Pav came on.
    Sandro was awesome.

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