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Dawson Torches Shirt In Boardroom Demo

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Michael Dawson wants out. Late last night the Spurs defender set fire to his team shirt at White Hart Lane in protest during an impassioned plea for a pay rise to Levy & Co turned into what experts are calling a ‘pyrotechnic palaver’.

Eyewitnesses are claiming that heated negotiations became literally combustible when the player, unable to cope with the Chairman’s hard ball iced tea tactics, lost his head and ignited his squad shirt in the North London Club’s boardroom.

Obviously this is cobblers. Made up. Untrue. But you have to ask yourself, ‘What’s next?’ There are two issues here. The players and the media. I’ll address the last one first.

I refuse to blame the media. Whilst we want the conventional press and us online wallahs to report in a reputable manner and not ‘make things up’ we cannot expect them not to report at all. It doesn’t work like that. Nor can you sit there in a huff acting all hurt that the news reported doesn’t suit you.

So then to the players. Guess what? Here’s where your problem is. The bulk of these  guys have nothing to do and all day to do it in. The bulk of them aren’t burdened academically. When their brains aren’t being pounded with choons via Jazzy Beats headphones they are either being tattooed or ordering bottles of Champagne that cost more than a small car.

So faced with a Chairman who runs a tight ship, knows he only has 36,000 seats to sell every other week and only so much in the bank they have to become inventive. Low animal cunning inventive. Jerry distracting Tom inventive and consequently the results are as cartoon like.

‘We had agreement!’ bleated Modders as security fecked him out a side door. No, schmuko. You have a contract.

Now we have the boy Dawson nervously approaching the venerable Bede, bowl in hand wanting more gruel. ‘Please sir, I want … I want m m m more, sir.’ Except the Little Levy doesn’t suddenly morph into Harry Secombe. He simply takes off his glasses, smiles faintly and asks, ‘Why?

A source close to the player has told The Sun that Mickey feels undervalued. Well guess what. So do we, son.

Yesterday I wrote that it was always the way that players came and went and it us – the mugs – clunking through the turnstiles, the mugs ordering polyester shirts with a little badge sewn into it, the mugs who leap about like madmen when a goal goes in on the radio … us mugs who stay forever.

So Michael,  if this ‘source close to the player’ is fictional tell us. If it is true then join the queue of slouches and also rans who in the final analysis never quite cut it with the people that count.

Us.

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181 comments

  • jan says:

    is it just me or do we like Daws so much because he’s a lovable fool? don’t lose the lovable bit Daws!

  • Mark says:

    Why even write the article if it is lies? How many articles on Modric have been completely over the top? How can it be said he will go, is unhappy etc.etc. The writers do not have exact facts!! It is disgusing. Harry you are a Spurs supporter i hope.Please write something positive like with all our injuries and poor striker form last season we almost made top 4!!!!!!

  • Spursforme says:

    I like bum fun

  • j says:

    just looked at the dawson thing in the sun, everyone actually beleives it even though its clearly BULLSHIT. gaaawd.

  • Devonshirespur says:

    If reports are true, he is on £35k, a contract signed 18 months ago and is being offered another £5k.

    That is about a 14% pay rise.

    While I think Dawson is a committed and loyal servant, and deserves to be paid well, I think all footballers need to stop look around them and see that the average punter is not getting a pay rise, nor have they for a few years, most are lucky to have jobs and all the while the price of the season ticket goes up another £40 (6%), along with everything else.

    Perhpas their visit to South Africa where they will no doubt be visiting some kids far less well off than us all will give these guys some f*#~ing perspective!

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