Date: 18th May 2011 at 12:06pm
Written by:

One from the You Couldn’t Make It Up Department.

A £25,000 per table of ten fund raiser took place at the Grosvenor Hotel in London on Monday night for the West Ham Acadamy. Full page adverts in the event’s programme were priced at £1000. The guests were described by the Club as ‘high profile’ and included club ‘Legends’ and some of the capital’s leading rag & bone men.

John Lyle’s family probably weren’t there as Karren Brady removed the their complimentary Season Tickets last week.

The gala turned into a brawl straight out of Carry On Cowboy. Supposedly this was sparked by Demba Ba claiming he was too tired to sign a fan’s Bull Staffy puppy.

James Corden hosted along with Ben Shepard and Stacey Solomon… well she was there. There was an auction.

Prizes included World Cup tickets (£10k the pair), Be chairman for the day (£4k), a round of golf on Golds private course with him and a day at the spa for your missus(£4k), Ali signed glove(£3k), mascot for the Man Utd game (£5k, I think), a day at the racetrack with Zola (£3k), use of the pitch at Upton Park f or a matc h/tournament (£8k), be included in the official 2010/11 team photo(£3k).

Eye witnesses reported tables being overturned, glasses being smashed. A vase was ‘high kicked’ and one MC asked the raving mob to please sit on chairs, not to throw them.’

The evening concluded with a cabaret consisting of police and security guards chasing gala guests up and down stairs, in and out lifts etc.