Levy & Co To Open A Jewish/Japanese Restaurant

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It’s going to be called  The Sosueme.

Good morning fight fans and welcome to another installment of Two Dirty Old Men & A Brady.

So West Ham are to take time out from a busy schedule of selling season tickets to street urchins at £90 a pop and embark upon a course of legal action against The Sunday Times and Tottenham Hotspur Football Club.

Lord Sugar must be laughing so hard right now that the task for Wednesday night will be to design & market him a ventilator. ‘And remember teams, none of that Amstrad rubbish. This must be robust.’

Robust is the buzz word. West Ham’s official statement is adamant that their bid was robust. I’m always fascinated by the the use and frequent corruption of language. And I’m not just talking about my typos.

Robust. Webster’s tells us this means vigorous. Sturdy. Exhibiting strength.

Not words I would have immediately associated with a relegated outfit of chancers soon to be stripped of their best players whilst staring down the barrel of a stadium they are never going to fill unless they replace their entire back four with Take That. And this from within the quicksand like depths of the Championship.

Lord Sugar called it right. They are indeed blowing more than bleedin’ bubbles now. And even sooner than even the most sceptical of us might have imagined.

In a ‘Club Statement’ West Ham say,

“We are so confident in the probity of our actions that we will take the strongest action possible against any suggestion of wrongdoing on the part of West Ham United or its officers, as well as involve the police and the data protection registrar in regard to the accessing of private information by illegal means.”

That sounds quite bullish; like they may just be onto something. But then if you let a few facts get in the way, let a few pivotal pieces of information through all the bluster you get a very different picture.

A soon to be relegated football club, that cannot sell out in it’s existing ground, up to it’s crotchless frillies in debt, manages to convince their local council in a time of austerity to rustle up £40million in used notes and back their application to become tenants of an Olympic Stadium.

Then it transpires that the West Ham Bidding Director is shacked up with the Corporate Director of the Olympic Park Legacy Company.

This only turns out to be half the tale. The missing piece of this puzzle which incidentally a chimpanzee with a saucepan stuck on it’s head could solve is that this Corporate Director at the Olympic Park Legacy Company, who’s shacked up with the West Ham Bidding Director turns out to have been on the payroll of West Ham as a consultant, wait for it… in relation to West Ham’s bid for the Olympic Stadium.

If that’s robust, then everyone one Facebook actually knows every single one of their friends. It’s not been in the public interest to disclose this information I’ll eat my hat.

The funniest element (aside from the West Ham statement in full, which is available in HERE) is that West Ham suing The Sunday Times has to  raise the question in Rupert Murdoch’s mind, ‘How happy am I signing cheques in favour of a person who works for an organization that’s taking a legal action against me?’ Karren #facelikeakickedinfridge will probably decry getting binned by Rupe as a sexist outrage.


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  • Roland Rat says:

    Well if they were shacked up together they probably didn’t talk to each other!

    • Harry Hotspur says:

      Ha, Or when she was spilling the beans he tuned it out as he presumed she was nagging about something tedious.
      That would actually stand up in any court.

  • jiz says:

    Harry if I could I would have your babies

  • Tongy says:

    This was always inevitable… you have to love Levy, I bet he can’t even get on a plane to Vegas, he’s so good at poker! All this information we dig up and release at a time when we are looking for public funding for our own stadium.

    Me thinks a deal will be done to save some MP’s blushes.

  • Chirpy says:

    The Porn Pikeys’ antics would be all the more amusing had they not roundly out-manoeuvred us in our bid for the Olympic Stadium.

    My earlier missive:

    When it mattered, prior to the OPLC announcement, the Levy/THFC’s strategy and actions were politically naive in the extreme. If the aim now is to somehow paint the WHU ‘bid’ as toxic, it is perhaps even more ill conceived – there is too much political weight and reputation behind the decision to award it to West Ham and they (OPLC, the Mayor, central government, etc) will simply want to ‘kill’ (quash) any outstanding debate and focus on the Olympics. It is no-one’s interest, other than Spurs (and Orients’) to prolong the saga, and that won’t be enough; without political (or judicial, it seems) support Levy is going nowhere with this.

    Furthermore, let’s hope this initial exposé (of OPLC / West Ham) is just a ‘taster’, otherwise in seeking to bring pressure to bear, Tottenham Hotspur’s actions (and the West Ham / Newham reactions) will conspire to make it more difficult, not more likely, for (the Mayor, or government) to do a deal in respect of funding and/or transport.

    In summary, it is the implied threat (of exposure) that is required, not actually doing it – no matter how briefly amusing it is.

    NB: another London club getting a march on us (in terms of a larger capacity stadium) will have serious commercial consequences in the long term – particularly one so close to the City of London and ripe for takeover in the inevitable future economic upturn.

    • John White says:

      The question to be resolved is not “did they (initially) out-manoeuvre us?”, but did they do so legitimately?
      “It is no-one’s interest, other than Spurs’ (and Orients’) to prolong the saga” – Well certainly The Sunday Times disagrees with you, and while you are undoubtedly correct that the political establishment has been (more than?) wholeheartedly behind the West Ham bid so far, you are reckoning without the ability of the hypocrites concerned to desert a sinking ship, once it becomes obvious they have backed a loser (sorry for the mixed metaphors). If there is more mileage in this story, West Ham United and the mouthy three in particular will find themselves in a very lonely position.

      • Chirpy says:

        Hi John, that they’d ‘out manoeuvred us’ was a statement, not a question. Indeed, the media have ‘column inches’ to fill, however my assertion is that this particular political ship will not be allowed to sink – it would be far too embarrassing for too many people and in the run up to the Olympics in particular, it simply will not be ‘allowed’. IF we have evidence of substantial wrong-doing then it can be put to better use not leaking it the press.

    • Astromesmo says:

      I have to agree with John that your harrumph is both on and wide of the mark at the same time.

      I think you’ve got a very salient point on the potential for the Caravan massive to suddenly get some overseas sugar daddy and be propelled way beyond their current position. So we have to be mindful of our own shop while we’re mocking the fire sale posters going up in the window.

      On the manouvering, I think Levy (for once) played a fairly straight hand. Staggeringly. I get the feeling that he started off using the bid as no more than leverage to get our own project off the launchpad – And as a result, made it as deliberately unpalatable as possible (No running track etc.). As the show went on however, and no-one at Boris towers was saying ‘No’, he put more weight behind it on the off-chance it might work.

      Let’s face it, we kind of know our Danny by now (In that knowing his mind is completely unkowable!) and I can’t see for a minute that he would have been so blatant about throwing the running track in a skip if he’d really wanted the deal. He’s cleverer than that.

      I think his harrumph is entirely fake and centred around getting the funding for our real project and the constant crowing of FLAKIF is his best weapon. The politicians hate him already, so he’s got nothing to lose, but they will pay to shut HER up not HIM!

      • Chirpy says:

        Hi Astro, I wholeheartedly agree, Levy did (naively in my opinion, as West Ham were never going to) play a straight hand.

        Whatever the basis was for our original application, as we developed our bid the considerable financial/commercial benefits of the Olympic Stadium, in comparison to NDP, became apparent and as a result the Olympic Stadium became Levy’s preferred outcome.

        If funding for NDP is the aim (Brady is an irrelevance and) stories like this make that outcome more unlikely.

  • Dick Scratcher says:

    “There’s a new Kosher Japanese restaurant opening soon. It’s called “So-Sue-Me.” Quite apt with today’s headlines

    Yes, the old Glatt Kosher Japanese dining experience oy vey, no doubt it had to be in New York.

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