“I’d be lying if I sat here and said I wouldn’t have Joe Cole at the club.”

Can the last fan leaving The Lane please turn the light off.

I have been frowned at by some for ‘Arry Bashing.’ So it will be interesting to see how many still in the happy clapper club want to renounce their inexplicable blind faith and join the free thinking majority.

Joe Downsy Cole. Having taken some time to reflect upon Arry’s CV I’ve reached the inevitable conclusion he is a magnificent firefighter. He knows where you can buy buckets, he’s always got a mate that’ll sell you some top top water.

But when it comes to managing a side that isn’t at death’s door he is actually revealed as being incapable of seeing beyond his innate shorttermism.

The happy clappers need to take a breath and realise that I am not ignoring his good work. I’m simply refusing to ignore increasing evidence that his judgement is not sound when out of a crisis.

His spending at Tottenham has been, within the wages constraints quite free. Certainly, outside of those Clubs with billionaire backers and money launderers behind them he has been assisted with good financial support.

He brought in Crouch and Defoe, both of who effectively flat-lined. You cannot bas an argument in support of a football based upon anything other than goals. If you do, you are a Bendtner fan.

It is easy with the luxury of hindsight to say that Suarez would have been a better bet than Defoe, but is it really hindsight given he was superb at Ajax and Liverpool and Tottingham weren’t the only ones to think so? Arry likes familiar faces and boys that speak the Queen’s.

I have suspected for some time now that Modric’s success has largely been down to the player’s naturally abiility rather than any ‘mentoring’ from Arry. This explains why Kranjcar who is a very good player has not been mentored, not been improved. As with Pav who anecdotally we are told was asked to, ‘run about a bit.’

The willingness to accept the sale of Modric reveals him as fool who would throw antiques onto a fire to keep warm, rather than sell one or two and buy some bloody coal.

Pointy was damaged goods after Liverpool, but this didn’t stop Arry shipping him in without pausing for breath. Why we bought Pienaar I honestly still cannot fathom. Then there was the public courting of Scott Parker. Here is a guy that Chelsea once bought, much in the manner they bought SWP in order to prevent to anyone else doing so.

By the time Parker caught anyone’s eye again he was an aging, bustler with at best 70 minutes in the tank. And thanks to the Porn Barons an expensive player.

And so to Joe Cole. A man that got an even bigger squeeze than Pointy did from LFC as when they took him in, he wasn’t even able to make his then current sides first team. 

And now we, the mighty Tottingham are officially in for him.

I could weep.