Date: 3rd October 2011 at 6:54am
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Good morning.

We wake to a new dawn. The mighty Arsenal vanquished by a new…

Look let’s get a few things straight. I have a sore throat from screaming yesterday. I got so wrapped up in proceedings I didn’t even get around to drinking the house dry. But we just beat one of the worst Arsenal teams to play us in maybe over a decade. 

Yes I am delighted, but we need to look at what happened yesterday. Enjoy some pomp, but not entirely forget the circumstance. 

The team sheet managed to pit Modders and PNB against four and occasionally five of their lot in midfield. I would suggest that actually fielded a side that would appeal to a Lane baying for a wrought rather than one that would be more suited to doing the job. He needed on from the start and he bottled it.

His line up’s success hinged upon ‘things going our way’ and with some particularly crap passing and a good few insane hoofs at that didn’t transpire.

6 An illegal card game was broken up in the Park Lane and it was discovered that was the dealer. ‘Just wanted some action, man’ the big man told stewards.

8 His goal was ‘spiffing.’ Not my words, but those of What Goal? Magazine. A good shift all around. Brain working much much faster than ever before. More please.

8 Bar that Vin Repast moment he as predicted his teaming up with Ledley King made him a solid as you could want. That’s what she said.

8 I shudder to imagine what we would be like without him after games like that. I guess the real question is who is lined up to replace him? He’s tip top.

6 Mmn. Needs to rapidly turn around recent form. He’s going backwards and Assured and Elegant has become plain old again. Whassssup geeze?

7 Played out of position. So what is he supposed to do, write to his MP? Great finish but we could have had more had he been – played in position. Geddit?

6 Outnumbered and having an off day. What a cracking combination. 

9 MOTM faced with a huge burden he got stuck in. Really impressed with his commitment and his seamless transition into the squad. Top charlie banana.

6 Some good runs but fluffed numerous chances this combined with being a defensive passenger made for a pretty lame performance. Must do better.

6 An A for effort but as low as a C+ for achievement. He needs more space and time than Doctor Who. That said a goal, and we’d be all over him, eh?

6 Not at the races. Not at all. Spent all of last week apologizing to Arsenal fans and should spend all of this week apologizing to fans. 

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