How We Spank Manchester City + A FREE ‘Redschnapps’ Bingo Card For Sunday

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Good afternoon.

I watched the Wiganistas vs Manchester City last night. Having  managed to tune out a mystifying/irritatingly over reverent commentary …the facts of matter where that Wigan, who had little to offer put in a commendable performance and more interestingly may have highlighted to Arry & Co what has to be done only as well as that which shouldn’t.

Above all else, Defensive discipline is vital. You build a team from the back to the front.  

If you watch the way City tend to attack – and not just last night – a lot of moves stem from controlling positions in the last third. They move the ball around outside the penalty area looking to thread it in to a midget such as Aguero and or put it onto Dzeko’s nut. 

Kyle Walker’s ‘tag defending’ or Forest Gump 50 yard dash impressions will sink us. He achieved naff all against Wolves and against a outfit like City being caught out of position will only result in us being punished.  

If you’re paid to be a defender than defend. We have players paid to take the ball up and service our goalscorers. Let’s use them. 

Let width be our watchword. On their day, Bale and Azza Blud can be two of the most outstanding players in the league. So let’s play them in position. Watching Bale play his ‘License To Roam’ card is about as thrilling and rewarding as using photographs of Piers Morgan to wallpaper your entire house. 

This is the Best Performing Side Since ’61™ and why be so daft/insane as sabotage that by mucking about with a winning formula? Bale has been frequently lethal on the wing. Azza Blud when he engages his brain can fizz and skip past players, creating space and havoc. 

Why would you change that? Why?

Never overlook the obvious solutions. Push and run has never been out of fashion. We all watched Swansea move the ball about on the floor against the Woolwich Wanderers. The monkey on the telly used the word ‘triangles’ when describing this ‘revolutionary’ tactic, bless ‘im.

City are constantly referenced around money. But they have more to them than a list of expensive mercenaries as long as your arm. The have become increasingly physical in all departments. A glance at their disciplinary stats makes for interesting reading. 

This season they have dished out 235 fouls, of which 34 generated cards. Our numbers are 180 fouls and 26 cards. Add to this the play acting factor.

Bale has perhaps understandably of late added falling over quite easily to his repertoire. But the City lot have got this down to fine art. So here’s a suggestion. Why don’t we keep the ball on the damn floor and pass it past ’em?

Here’s to a sane, stylish and speedy Spurs performance.

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