Date: 13th July 2012 at 11:22am
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Hello young lovers.

Jermain ‘What? What? I didn’t see you! Bruv, it was on so I took it’ has been in talks with Reading. 

I’ve mixed feelings about the Midget Gem. He’s scored so many goals, so many important ones. Specifically ones that got us out of schtuck. Yet his spiel his routine lacked variety. Receives ball, turns, shoots, winces. 

Where would he fit in under the André Villas Boas high line? I do not know. What I do know is that he was struggling to get starts under , the manager that has been a fan of his since he was knee high to linesman’s flag.

The interesting mumble – and mumble is all that it is at this stage – is the name of Kaká. Hold tight on the upper deck.

It’s well documented that has been somewhat of a career cul-de-sac for one of the world’s greatest players and I’m told that Los Blancos are looking for compensation of ballpark £20M for him. Bare in mind he was sold to them for them for a reported £59M in 2009.

Will it happen? Hahahaha. What I can tell you is that serious enquiries have 100% been made. This club is not mucking about any more.

The gloves are off.