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Long Is The Way And Hard, That Out Of Hell Leads Up To Lilywhite

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Good afternoon.

I was in analysis, you should know that about me, I was in group analysis when I was younger, ’cause I couldn’t afford private…I was captain of the latent paranoid softball team. We used to play all the neurotics on sunday morning. Nailbiters against the bedwetters, and if you’ve never seen neurotics play softball, it’s really funny. I used to steal second base, and feel guilty and go back.

Obviously stolen from Woody Allen, but I am seriously beginning to wonder about the mental health of my fellow fan. The narrow mindedness of many has left me pretty convinced that we are in no small part supported by a gaggle of small mined simpletons. Ha. Maybe this is my Gerald Ratner moment.  Well if I wake up after lunch to discover they’ve gone then sentient few that remain are blessed.

Do we need strikers, do we in fact need a bit of need of good transfer lovin’ in any number of departments? Of course we do.

But does anyone seriously believe that Levy & Co. are somehow nonchalantly swanning about only occasionally checking their email during the adverts on daytime television? These critics are the same pseudo commie neo pinko idiots that still believe the Chairman’s only in it for the money and/or that Joe Lewis needs to stick his hand in his pocket. Jesus wept. 

Patience isn’t a virtue in football, as in real life it’s a necessity. If you think that footballers sit on shelves in some mystical footballer supermarket somewhere, beneath a shelf-talker with bar code and care instructions printed upon it? Some expectens of millions spent on a man who they can adopt and champion as ‘this seasons Messiah’ with the same expedience they’d employ buying a Happy Meal.

I hear your pain brother, alas Mr Jolly lives next door. The firm are on it.

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274 comments

  • Clarkspur says:

    “But does anyone seriously believe that Levy & Co. are somehow nonchalantly swanning about only occasionally checking their email during the adverts on daytime television?”

    – I presume Levy’s watching Beeb 1 then!

    Besides, all you need to know about the striker situation can be found here –

  • Ginge1 says:

    A little bit of ITK, a letter has come into my possession. It says we have to take out Nicholas Parsons?

  • Bruxie says:

    That’s a bold thread for the school holidays, HH.

    I will have no sympathy whatsoever – when the kids take you to task on why we haven’t signed Ronaldo, Messi and Kaka.

    Ade is surely ours.

    Mancini says he is finished at Citeh. Levy is telling him to hang on in there until the £5m is there to compensate the wage bill.

    He’ll be with us by 31/8 or Citeh will have to fork out £170k per week.

  • Clarkspur says:

    Fucking fuck fuck – won’t let me post a URL

  • Luke says:

    Your wrong Harry. Fair do’s, anyone with half a brain realises DL must be working on behind the scenes, but like in so many of your other posts you proclaim to know what’s going on but now you tell people to chill. Do you know what’s DL is thinking or who he’s lined up or who he’s tried to sign but pulled out, and for what reasons??? You tell people to chill when you spend all summer giving them false hope.

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