Good morning.
What’s in name? In a age where players’ are queuing round the block to see osteopaths and physios due to agrevated bouts of heading turning, accusations of race hate and the sinister world of roasting, a name or specifically your good name is quite possibly the only thing of value left in the game.
Players reveal just how good their name or how mud-like it is in a variety of ways. Parking in a disabled space when out for a meal, getting arrested for sexually assaulting a girl, shooting an intern, getting addicted to any variety of drugs…
Newcastle United have announced that Sid James’ Park is to changed to The Sports Direct Arena. If you open a window, you will be able to hear a mixture of sounds; that of a thousand hearts breaking, that last nail being tapped into a football club’s coffin. Mike Ashley is to most up there a rather despised figure. Despite having pumped copious amounts of real money into Toon he is still viewed as a cockney mafioso.
The renaming deal is, if you bother to read the announcement in full a temporary measure. But this is clearly a lie. On those swanky architects dreams we were shown of the new Lane, there is a ‘Your Company’s Name Here’ emblazoned on the roof or whatever. Even the thickest CEO in the world cab visualize his branding whacked on the side of a stadium, on the side of anything.
No, Ashley has failed to adhere to basic maximum of life – if you’re in a hole, stop digging – and this in an age of austerity a rather cynical move involving tax advantages and some horribly misguided self publicity.
Sports Direct is a fabulous operation, gone are the days of paying over the odds for sportswear that you’ve no great attachment to. If you just want a decent pair trainers and hoodie to go to the company gym in or have perhaps been invited to participate in a little light looting, they are your one stop affordably priced shop. But as a branding exercise this tramples on tradition. The perception of the new name is not ‘blue chip.’
Let’s hope that Levy & Co are watching …and learning. The current shirt sponsorship deals in place at Tottenham have been considered and quite clever. Neither Investec or Autonomy carry any great baggage. Manys first response to both was, ‘who?’ The cosmetic integrity (you can tell your kids where you read that phrase first) of the shirts is largely intact. It’s primarily a Spurs shirt. A shirt with WONGA.COM plastered across it can never come back from being the gaudy piece of junk it has been reduced to. Why not add ‘Keys Cut While U Wait At Brian’s Heel Bar’ beneath the number on the reverse?
Football is doing it’s very best to alienate the hand that feeds it.
The Wii Bowl
Surely a more appropriate name for the barcodes stadium would have been… ‘BEEP’
‘The 10 Items or Less Stadium’
PMSL
Discharge Dome…
Maybe they could get the head of FIFA to open it and rename it the SBlatterbowl?
Emirates should be renamed ‘Anusol’, or ‘Preparation H’- ‘Prep H’ for short.
Live from the Anusol tonight…
Tempers were inflamed at the Prep H tonight.
Arsenals/ Wengers passage was eased tonight at the Anusol stadium.
:pinch: More Like ‘Arsenal’s bloody passage was eased tonight at the Anusol stadium’
‘The Armitage Shanks Bowl’.
‘The Thomas Crapper Cauldron’
‘The Commode Colosseum’
Fair cop. You done me guv.
The Bog Standard Stadium.
Gervinho’s Head Dome
Thank heavens we’re not owned by Anne Summers!
Only a matter of time for the Spammers :whistle: …….
The WHam-ASStadium-it has more than a ring to it, don’t you think?
:sick: Strapadicktome Park….
On the one hand, who the hell cares who the
sponsor is? They’re just there to pay the bills.
On the other hand, the “Tesco Store-Brand Vodka & Axe for Women Arena at Tottenham” would be a major hit to my Spurs pride.
I’ll still call it ‘the Lane’ (New Lane?, or is that too Millwallish), regardless of what corporate entity decides to give us a large bag of money.
I always remember comparing the names “White Hart Lane” and “Cold Blow Lane” and concluding that ours conjured up an almost romantic image, and theirs looked as if it was the location for “Dotheboys Hall” or “Bleak House”.
Did they ever have a manager called “Wackford Squeers”? I believe they used to have a player called “Harry Crippen”
Probably had Fred West on their books at one point!
It was Harry Cripps actually. Sorry for the confusion.
Looked him up on Wiki and saw: “Arry’s Bar at The New Den is named in honour of Harry Cripps, which is a play on words of his Millwall nickname, ‘Arry Boy”.
A play on words indeed? Wow! Next thing they are going to become really sophisticated and learn how walk upright.
I am reminded, Q. Why do Millwall fans have skinhead haircuts?
A. Too difficult to teach them how to comb hair.
“A play on words indeed? Wow! Next thing they are going to become really sophisticated and learn how walk upright”.
They still gawp and point at aircraft down there!
I like ‘Axe For Women Stadium’ for the Mans Hity.
With the ‘Stone The Adulteress Stand’, the ‘Forced Marriage Shelf’, the ‘Female Circumcision Kop End’ and the ‘Honour Killing Memorial Stand East’.
Buy one adult ticket and women go free.
I think you might have something here. We could also have naming rights for the hospitality and corporate boxes named after Muslim heroes.
Who wouldn’t want to pay extra for an a nonalcoholic drink in the comfort of the Idi Amin Lounge, and then have your Halal Chicken Kebab whilst watching the game from the comfort of the Gaddaffi Suite?
Mustn’t forget “Cameroon”.
@LosLorenzo
This is about the naming rights at Shiteh.
Far better to have naming rights for the hospitality and corporate boxes named after Christian heroes…….like Thatcher, Reagan, Bush, Blair, Cheney, Rice, Straw, Cameroon etc :whistle: ………
Oooh! Ooooh! Now someone do Jewish heroes and let’s really get it rockin’ in here!
“Oooh! Ooooh! Now someone do Jewish heroes and let’s really get it rockin’ in here”!
Judas?……
What’s Sol got to do with it?
“What’s Sol got to do with it”?
:daumen:
Levy?…….
How about a half time stoning to the death? beats watching those bloody police dogs and very acceptable if we can also see Blatter’s hands cut off, the thieving bastard!
You’ll be lucky! I used to get stoned at half time on a regular basis, then came the smoking ban…. :angry: ^^