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Player Ratings Made To Make Your Mouth Water

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Good morning.

Apologies for lack of activity but I am assured that thanks to the sterling efforts of the world’s finest digital minds the damp sellotape holding the server together has been replaced with stout British string. 

The game against Newcastle goes straight into the Top 10 of the best I’ve ever seen. The stage was set for a tough ol’ showdown. Newcastle it could be said, still had the wind up ’em. Pardew has almost reached the point where he can travel to and from Sid James Park without an armed guard.

Newcastle may have in part inexplicably failed to have shown up, but we didn’t win 5-0 because the pitch was on a slant and the ball rolled in of it’s own accord.

Highlights? Krankie proved a noble stand in for the missing Dutchman, who for keen eyed kids was in a box, on the wine wearing one of those foam musical birthday cake hats. 

Walker’s defending is visibly improved. That’s all I ever asked for. I never said he needed to work on his conversational Japanese. Pathe News Boy is the N17 Enforcer. Bale was a bit off the boil. Adebayor was a sensation. A revelation. Saha may well be mounting the greatest comeback since Lazarus.

The stars of the show were the home crowd and the manager. I like lots of singing. I like the manager going bonkers when the goals go in. So I was a very happy boy with all of that business.  

Click on the player images for a vintage treat!

 7 Carling Black Label

 8 Man of the people.

 7 He’s passed his fizzical.

 7 A lotta bottle.

 7 The Avenger.

 8 Don’t take away our Breakaway.

 7 Cinzano.

 9 Buy British.

 9 As much fun as an Atari in 1981.

 10 Plink plink fizz…

 9 Action Man Sharp Shooter

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167 comments

  • batters says:

    you still want Redknapp out Harry?? Twat!!

  • JPG466 says:

    Haha Saha… Lazarus comeback had me in fits Harry…

    Best ever display in the Redknapp era, given it was CL challengers Newcastle we tore apart..

    Ade at his vintage best, showing zest from the first minute.. 4 assists + goal surely a record

    Niko’s stock is rising… would have scored another if he wasn’t wearing an XXXL shirt..

    United might not be feeling so cocky now coming to the Lane soon…

    Arry keeps talking of CL spot, but i’m hoping its one of his poker tricks and he really believes his boys are title stuff.

  • rogerspurs says:

    “United might not be feeling so cocky now coming to the Lane soon…”

    Expect the Govan Grenache Guzzler to keep promoting Arry for the England role. Arry’s magic is working a little too effectively for the Sky 4 elite, and as a result they can’t get him moved on soon enough. We’ll see if he still has the support of his PL management peers when he’s trying to get their players released for England duty….I think not. Beware Arry – you are being set up by one-and – all for a big fall!

  • mattspurs says:

    The front two were awesome – think back a year ago and we started the odd game with Pav and Crouch!!

    Our central midfield partnership is simply outstanding.

    Personally thought Niko was our weakest player – an 8 in a team of 8’s 9’s and 10’s.

    What struck me was Bale’s width – he stayed wide on either side and his selfless running made space for at least two of the goals.

    Thought the subs did well too, Defoe looked lively and sent in a few crosses, poor Azza was so shocked that Defoe passed to him in the box he fluffed his lines. Even Nelson looked a massive improvement on Bassong.

  • Kash says:

    Bassong was shite for Wolves even Eye by Gum had to take him off. What about Mick McCarthy for the England job. He got ROI to the World Cup and has a great sense of humour. But for me the only 2 real candidates are 1) Glenda 2) Guus Hiddink.

    • Essexian76 says:

      If Hoddle was ever given the Spurs job again, initially I’d be shocked closely followed by vomiting and nausea, then solemn a vow never to watch my beloved Spurs ever again. He ranks as the worse manager ever in my time as a Spurs supporter. Clueless, arrogant and aloof..perfect for England though!

      • Kash says:

        Afternoon Essexian or with your parentage Top of the Bonjour. I meant for the England job NOT the Spurs job. Glenda had his chance with us and well we all know the rest. Ps can you speak fluent French ??

        • Essexian76 says:

          No, I can understand it better than your average bear (mostly swearin’ and a cussin’), but being one an awful lot of siblings, Mum never got us to speak the lingo-but fluent in Yiddish though, having been bought up in Stamford Hill, Oi-vey

        • Kash says:

          Its never easy being in a large family and then having to leanr another language makes it more difficult. But it is easier when your a kid. Am now in krautland having to learn the lingo and my kids speak both the queens and kraut without having to think. Totally automatic. Old dog new tricks etc. ( for those who could not work it out I am the old dog and language is the new trick )

        • Essexian76 says:

          used to visit Germany often through work, and really like the country and it’s people, but Europe’s pretty cool (hate Italy though) but Scandinavia is by far my favourite place. I guess having ‘foreign’ parents gives you an openness, but it’s probably my London roots that are mostly responsible for that, having a variant array of 2nd generation school mates..in any event it certainly improves your diet

      • Hartley says:

        Christian Gross :hae:

        • Essexian76 says:

          Sooner Gross incompetence than another dose of Hoddle, merci beaucoup, an’ all. But yes Hoddle for England-Hoddle for England-all together now

    • MynameisLuka says:

      I’d have Mick back as the national manager in a heartbeat…better than Trapapony any day!

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