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Smatterfaeces & Cross: Please Go To The Toilet, I Think You’re Both Full

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Good evening.

I missed the John Cross interview with Smatterfaeces earlier today.  But I have it now. My particular thanks to @JellySmiff for very kindly supplying the required URL.

Smatterfaeces kicks off with a token nod at being allowed onto the premises at The Lane. If I were Levy & Co. I’d remove this crumb’s access. Who cares if he likes going there? His job is to report and may I add at this juncture I don’t even care if it’s objective, biased or bi-curious.

What isn’t on is him swanning about the gaff being all chummy. But then once on air being all sniffy about THFC, talking about them with such contempt …well it’s difficult to believe he values his free seat. In fact it’s impossible. 

So we have a Chelsea fan of diminished broadcast talent goading along a hostile witness anyway in the form of the ever amiable John Cross. 

Cross’ Arsenal credentials aren’t the issue. And it would also be crude to simply level a charge of being just another one of Arry’s media pals at him. Cross is guilty of a far more serious crime. Guilty of having a nafifng clue about the subject matter for which …he gets paid.

Smatterfaeces is a low rent ringmaster and Cross a partially house trained chimpanzee in media circus that cannot give tickets away. Trading in sneers is no way to analyse football. Their conversation may have passed for banter between ‘a couple of white van man drivers’ in half empty pub on a rainy day, but it wasn’t.

The assertion that Andres Villas Boas is some ‘got lucky once schmuck’ is beyond disingenuous. It’s plain old carny mentally inbred thick. 

The solitary thing that amused me about these two is not that they think they can predict the future and but they clearly believe that on a more serreptitious level that they will tap into the innermost fears of Tottenham fans.

I’ve been (for me) quite avidly devouring analysis on Boas’ career to date. If you’re all very good boys and girls I may knock you bandy with my opinion on what’s out there tomorrow. I’ll leave you on this. Times have been tough online for sites to even stand still. talkSPORT might just want to consider what’s provoking debate and what’s alienating Ad revenue.

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232 comments

  • Hughdunit says:

    On another note, we are certainly giving off all the signs of being a organized this window… Two big ins early, what the farak is going on, I’m used to the last minute shenanigans on August 31… Now I’m confused due to all the July excitement

  • Hughdunit says:

    Christ, how did that rogue “a” slip in there. Apologies to the literate

  • Spurs 37001 says:

    Who gives a monkey’s about Matterface and Cross’ opinion about THFC. I was listening at the time and this piece appeared in the middle of a long and detailed discussion about Arsenal, RVP and Usmanov – which they were both really getting into. I think someone must have told them to discuss THFC in order not to lose any Spurs listeners. I think Keyes and Gray are good, Hawksbee and Jacobs are crap – one of them loves AVB(not),Durham is the devil’advocate and just talks sh*t to draw in callers and Goughie is a Tykeyid.Danny Kelly doesn’t seem to be a bit Anti THFC to me.
    I think a lot of the time there’s no news coming through and they have to talkcrap to draw in MrAngy mugs to keep the shows going.

  • Spurs 37001 says:

    Are Great Britain winning the Tennis or is Scotland losing.

  • mynameisluka says:

    What is going on?
    Fryers, Siggy, Verts, and looks like Addy is coming on board as well!
    triffic!

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