Blackpool

Van der Vaart Hurts Baby Cow

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Mornin’.

Tangerines away it is. Negatives other than the abject squalor of the town itself out the way first then. Our physio bench is once again to die for… VdV calf strain again (hence the daft headline), Charlie still recovering from an assassination attempt, Krankie, Wooders, King, Thud and Bale all writhing with gout.

This is only leaves us –  excluding the Dutchman – with the journeymen dregs of the squad what beat Italian giants AC Milan at the San Siro last week. So what does that say? I tells me in louder tones than a whisper that we’ll batter them. Battered tangerines. One of our pal, LOTW’s 5 a day.

Blackpool arrived in the premiership looking like a brand new shiny happy thing. Sunshine on a stick. A troupe of unheard of players all as keen as custard led by the quintessential seaside cheeky chappy. The landlady had a wink in her eye, the fairy lights burned brightly, the candy floss was extra fluffy and the livin’ was easy.

Then reality hit Blackpool like a Tom & Jerry safe free-falling from the tenth floor. Splat. The hot dogs were cancelled due a Health & Hygiene Order. The shops, bars, so called nightclubs and hotels’ fixtures and fittings in Blackpool are worth more than their receipts.

Blackpool’s borrowed time is  like watching a piece of film you’ve seen before in slow motion. Not gloating, just calling it as I see it. Whatever Holloway had going on evaporated before Charlie Adam became the white Flava Flav. The reality is that Blackpool came like too many before them into the Premiership ill equipped for the task ahead and I’m not talking about under-soil heating.

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Looking for way to feed and slurp myself I see Azza Blud as man who may skin a few tangerines tonight (see what I did there?) and Anytime Scorer in a modest 0-2 win is just dandy at 25/1.


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337 comments

  • skankehmonkeh says:

    ^^^That video^^^ Finally… :finn:

  • skankehmonkeh says:

    Oh my Dad also met Bale’s parents in a pub after and had a chat with them, said they were really nice and apparently he could have played for England when he was younger but chose Wales. Damn.

  • Charles says:

    Forget Hutton,he has cost Spurs quiet a few points and only has half the brain of Carluka.I close my eyes when the ball gets close to him.There can be no excuses tonite,to many great players in this Spurs squad.

  • Bilbo says:

    I would forget Hutton if Charlie was fit, but he aint. Gallas hates playing RB and it means Bassong will have to play CB with Les.

    • toddspur says:

      spot on Bibo Baggins; spot on

      Gallas aint mobile enough for 90-mins at RB IMHO

      I’d rather Wilson played there with Gallas alongside Daws

      Gomes
      Wilson, Gallas, Daws, A&E
      Lennon, Sandro, Modders, Krank (me up)
      Defoe & Pav

      Tough game but as per our away form we will just squeeze it by the odd goal

  • davspus says:

    Firstly Harry H, you can get a tangerines that are sweet but tonight we are facing a desperate bitter tangerines. We will need to have our score me quick hats on and a Rock solid defence Gomes will need to be a Tower of strength and its time Defoe stopped being a Donkey and light up is goal scoring boots. I have just seen Sammy Lee with a big bag of sweets to make Blackpool run run run and stop the mighty Spurs from leaving a sunken wreck and Liverpool swept away on a tide of white Cockerels heading for third and Glory. Coys to win 2-0

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