Wigan Away The Pre Match Prattle

Good morning.

So here we are once more. Over our shoulder a victory of sizable proportion; the smell of Scouse blood barely gone from the nostrils. Ahead of us a shower of a team that on paper we ought beat by five goals or more.  But will we? The defining characteristic of last season and indeed seasons before that has been the inability to sustain the vaguest consistency. 

Dances with Scones is staring down the blade of a scalpel and The Times report that Tommy’s ankle needs to be ‘opened up again.’ Ouch. No only horrible but surely surgery to blight a big chunk of this season for him.

Where is Azza Blud? Still injured? I say Azza is still on the lamb in LegoLand Windor and refusing to come out except to mount snatch and run raids for fast food items from the hands of small children. A fortnight in, he’s become quite feral. 

Gallas is out but thought to be perhaps being readied for Arsenal indoors which takes place in a week and a day. I would imagine that King will rested for this also. Late fitness tests for Pav, A&E and Arry Redschnapp’s script writers who are reported as ‘being exhausted’.

This should be another rout in our favour. History has taught us that this is highly unlikely. History my peachy arse say I and 0-2 is my prediction.