Arsenal

The Arsenal Delusion

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Mornin’

Difficult to know if this guy is speaking as a fully indoctrinated member of some religious cult or just an idiot with extremely small eyes. I’m sure I have pores bigger than his eyes.

Carl Jenkinson plays for Arsenal. No really he does. He’s a 20 year old in their reserves. He told Arsenal.com…

“They have a lot of good players – they’re obviously a good side and they have come together really well this year. There’s no hiding the fact they have done well, but we have got a stronger squad in my opinion and we have got to show that on Sunday. We have to beat them.”

Look I know he’s only twenty and a good advert for not letting the council cut your hair, but how is it there are still clowns like this, of voting age, wandering about in society?

There was a time when we played Arsenal and the best we could hope for was a  moment of individual brilliance. Or an act of God. But those days are gone. And I believe we won’t see them again for a generation.

The reality is that Arsenal’s squad isn’t stronger than any side above them  or many below. Nor I might add do they sit where they sit because of tactical brilliance. Arsenal have always striven to recruit technically adept players which is precisely why they have been surviving at the top level and not excelling for years now.

Arsenal’s strength? Think  Samson’s hair on Delilah’s barbershop floor. With strength comes aspiration and who actually aspires to play for Arsenal these days? Cesc Fabregas doesn’t. Samir Nasri doesn’t. And the epicentre of this malaise is Aunty Wenger herself.

The Professor a busted flush. The youth + tippy tappy thing simply doesn’t work and even the most dyed in the wool gooners are realising that love’s young dream is pretty much over. The endlessly recycled post match interview lines are now sticking in the gullet.

‘It was a game of great intensity, our players showed determination and application, this was a difficult surface for us…’

I don’t agree with managers getting the chop by impatient Directors, managers need time. But seven years of bouncing a clubs head off of the same ceiling, season after season? The distractions have been pleasing enough (lots of Champions League footy, a swanky new stadium) but what have they done with these extraordinarily enhanced revenue streams, what have they actually achieved? 

Wenger’s buying strategy is cocked. He went to Lille and came back with not Hazard but Gervinho. Instead of buying one of Europe’s hottest footballing properties he took up the option on a man who’s entire head of hair is composed from the ingeniously woven shoots from a particularly hairy wart on the nape of his neck.

The signs of decay are hugely visible on the terraces. A flood of young supporters hoping for the current squad to revisit the dynasty of winning stuff have been left sat about looking dejected. And silent clutching complimentary scarves.  Either not expecting mediocrity or unused to it; the atmosphere at The Emptycrates has failed to improve despite the club’s bizarre/desperate strategy of ‘Arsenaliztion’.

What does the future hold? Only 25% of Arsenal fans take up the option of a new season ticket when offered. And withing two years the Queensland Property cash cow’s udders will be barren. link

The case continues…

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187 comments

  • Dave says:

    Before talking about being deluded please remember there are quite afew games left to play this season.This time last year we were top of the league but fucked up big time!As Spurs have history of this(not winning much) please be careful you dont have egg on your faces come May!
    The marathon is on the sprint is faltering?

  • melcyid says:

    Very precise description of Gervinhos hair. Saw that Lady Di’s old hairdresser was at the Lane the other week.Ever thought of doing descriptive articles of his clients finished product bonces/barnets.
    I am sure they would like a bit of old fashioned honesty in this age of sycophants. :daumen:

  • Goonerism says:

    Visiting Gooner here and hard to argue with tha author of this piece. I almost choked on my tea when I read Jenkinson’s quote this morning. Sadly this is typical of the past few years, although I would say that this is the first season in many a year that anyone could say the Tottenham side is stronger than Arsenal, the league table never lies and you lot are a better side than us hands down. I’be actually enjoyed your football over the last few years. I read a comment earlier saying that the way Arsenal is run is not far off the way Spurs were being run in the 90s, not sure I agree but would be interesting to hear a Spurs opinion. Either way I still hope we get something at the weekend despite not being confident and good luck for the rest of your season.

    • jim says:

      Sugar changed us, pre him we were in rank order.

      • cyril says:

        hate to recognise it but sugar saved us, rag trade clown scholar put us on the brink. with ridiculous deals to support his cheap and nasty plastic clothes. bankruptcy papers filed in march 91, sale of gascoigne bailed us out, altho touch and go after his p[rice went from 7 mill to 4 and change after he messed up his knee, so i guess we owe it all to gazza

    • Sam says:

      Oi, who said you can come on over here and be all reasonable-like? Jog along or we may actually find that we (shudder) begin to like a Gooner.

      God forbid

  • Jacky Treehorn says:

    You have enjoyed our football over the last few years? Yeah pull the other one. More likely it burns a hole in your gut.

  • Potter says:

    What are you trying to achieve by printing this diatribe. This year you are in front and that’s the first time for ages . So just settle down and do your crowing in the middle of May.

    • Harry Hotspur says:

      I was hoping that my pants on an upstairs landing radiator would quicker; if you really want the inside track on this piece.

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